It’s some radom shit coming out due to the late night sleeping problems. Just wanna write it down so that Ican read it one day and comment like ‘jesus who’s this cheesy girl?!’
It’s been a few days since I’ve finished watching 13 Reasons Why and I thought or to be exactly I realized that I was a victim of bullying back in primary school and middle school indeed. I won’t go with any specific name or person. I just wanna make it clear that I tried to move on but the truth is even if I looked fine but deep inside me it is still that shy little girl trying to made her points by speaking directly to the teachers and fighting with those boys in class. It might be a little bit paradox, but it’s actually simple. Thereis no one specific person to blame, it’s everyone’s fault. The mess I made back in the old days really troubling my teachers and my folks. Well, not necessarily my friends, cause I’ve been trying to keep’em away from those shit like family emergency or something else. It’s weir that I never really trust any adults in my childhood including my parents. I don’t wanna explain why that shitgose that way. It’s just complicated.
Thses days I’ve been really anxious about my result of applying university. I literally have no idea whether I can get into it. It’s just lack of confidence. It’s just me.